Top Behaviors That Cause Distrust in the Workplace

Changes You Can Make Today

Psychologists have done extensive research on what makes people trust or distrust each other. If you find that other managers aren’t trusting you as much as you'd like, it might be worth looking at these four key areas that cause distrust in the workplace to adjust your behavior. While they’re not the only reasons for distrust, they’re definitely significant.

Remember, some people are naturally distrustful, which you can't control. But if you see yourself in any of these behaviors, they probably contribute to others' lack of trust in you.

You never feel guilty.

In a fascinating study, 401 adults were given a questionnaire to gauge how prone they were to experiencing guilt. They were then paired with a "partner" (actually a researcher), and the partner was given $1. If the partner chose to give it to the second person, the second person would get an extra $2.50 and could choose to keep it all or share it.

Guess who shared the money with the partner? The people who felt guilt more intensely.

How do you demonstrate guilt?

• Apologize for things you’ve done wrong,

• Accept the consequences of your actions.

• Don’t try to put the blame on other people.

Guilt isn’t just about religious beliefs or a moral compass; it’s about recognizing when your actions might hurt others. If you don’t feel guilt when you should, it’s a red flag that you’re not considering other people’s feelings, making you seem untrustworthy.

Even if guilt doesn’t come naturally to you, you can still adjust your behavior. Ask yourself, "How would I feel if I were in their shoes?" Your actions, not just your emotions, count.

You steal credit for other’s work.

Positive Psychology listed 10 ways to build trust. One stands out for managers: Don’t always self-promote.

In the office, a manager who takes credit for their team’s work will likely be someone nobody trusts. If you can’t say, “That was Jane’s idea. She’s a real asset to the company,” then people probably see you as untrustworthy.

Everyone knows managers don’t do everything themselves—that’s why you have a team. Constantly taking credit for everything shows you’re not honest, which undermines trust.

This ties in with another important point: Develop strong team skills and engage openly. Managers who work well with their team and peers are easier to trust. If you sit in your office and let others do the work, people won’t trust you as much as they would if you were actively involved. Just be careful not to take credit for the team's accomplishments.

To promote trust with your team and exhibit behaviors that make you trustworthy, emphasize these actions.

• Recognize and celebrate your team's achievements.

• Develop teamwork skills and actively participate with your team.

• Share the spotlight and give credit where it's due.

You don’t trust anyone else.

Trust is a two-way street. If you don't trust others, they won't trust you back. For example, if you’re a manager who installs tracking software on employees’ computers when they work remotely, you’re signaling a lack of trust. This doesn’t just affect your employees; it can make your fellow managers wary of you, too.

Psychologist David DeSteno, director of Northeastern University’s Social Emotions Lab, emphasizes that vulnerability is at the core of trust. You need to be willing to be vulnerable and trust that your employees are doing their work, just as they trust you to treat them impartially.

When you don't trust your team, why should they trust you to pay them fairly, promote the most qualified, or distribute work evenly? Your colleagues will also pick up on this, which can damage your credibility. How will people ever feel trustworthy if you need to monitor their every move?

Your colleagues will also notice this lack of trust and may perceive you as untrustworthy as well. Being trustworthy means allowing yourself to be vulnerable and not micromanaging. It’s about stepping back and showing you believe in your team.

To foster trust:

• Allow employees the autonomy to do their jobs.

• Set clear expectations and then step back.

• Focus on outcomes rather than minute details.

You share confidential information.

One surefire way to lose trust—among managers and the entire team—is to share information that was told to you in confidence. It doesn't matter what your intentions are—managers can always come up with a "good reason,"—but it's never okay to break someone's trust by gossiping about their personal issues or work-related concerns.

Even if you're trying to garner sympathy for an employee's situation that is affecting work, sharing confidential details is not justified. Managers who gossip lose big time. Other managers avoid them, and no one will ever trust them.

You need to:

• Keep private conversations private.

• Avoid gossip, even if it's seemingly harmless.

• Respect the privacy and boundaries of your colleagues.

You Can Make Changes

The good news? You can change these behaviors. While you can't change others, you can definitely work on yourself. If your team members, peers, or manager don’t seem to trust you, start by reflecting on any untrustworthy behaviors you might be displaying.

You need to stop immediately if you're engaging in blatantly untrustworthy actions (lying, stealing, gossiping, etc.). Trustworthiness extends beyond work, though; if you’re honest in your professional life but dishonest in your personal life, it can still affect how people perceive you.

For example, if your coworkers know you're having an affair, it might make them question your integrity, even if you’re upfront at work. Untrustworthy behavior in one area of your life can taint all aspects of how others view you.

To become more trustworthy, you must make these changes yourself. Trust isn’t something you can demand; you have to earn trust. It might take time and effort, but it’s worth it. Whether getting advice from a respected colleague, working with your manager, or even seeking help from a therapist, making the effort to change can make a significant difference.

Remember, trust is the cornerstone of all strong relationships at work and in life. By making these changes, you can create a more trusting and supportive environment for everyone around you.